The unusual tale of boy meets girl and girl meets slug. The Slug in question being an absurdly bright, black mollusc called Sebastian with a penchant for chicken nuggets, narrative pleasure and sex, will do anything to interact with the humans that share his world. Okay, I'm a slug, not brilliant I grant you but I do have my hobbies like television and people watching. When I slither my way up through the floorboards I find the human race in disarray; there's Jenny, mother of two, with her emotional and sexual shortfalls; then on one side of the terrace is Francis who just wants to be who she used to be if she could remember what that was; and on the other is a young professional couple who have aspirations, white carpets but perhaps not enough emotional bravery. They need my advice; I give them my advice because I know that life is all about sex and survival. But no one listens to a small slimey creature. I wish I was human.